my daily reflections…

honesty had to begin early in my recovery. i knew i was fucked when i came into the rooms for the first time my last time. after sleepin under bridges and on park benches with no hope for any better, lookin at powerlessness wasnt hard to do. it was a clear show of the unmanageability i had in my life. i had to concede within that i couldnt beat my alcoholism. and please dont think that just because i may have had a moment of clarity followed by an act of desperation, that after i had had a few good meals and a warm place sleep that my thinkin didnt have me wonderin if i wasnt an alcoholic. ya know how a few minutes of change can have one thinkin, “that shit wasnt sooo bad”. im grateful today for the powerlessness and unmanageability. i have some semblance of it today. ive learned that i am an alcoholic and have applied this knowledge so i can continue to seek a solution that truly works; i continue to admit it openly. i have learned to live accordingly, i read the big book and put what i learn into practice. i readily admit at any time when i can be of help, i suit up and show up, i have been renewed, and can admit i need Gods help. i can humble myself so his spirit flows through me and, in flowin through me, it sweeps away all the bitter past. each day unfolds somethin good, as long as i am livin the way i believe God wants me to live. powerlessness and unmanageability have turned into power and manageability. havin peace of mind, i get to use the tools ive been gifted with to make somethin useful of it and myself. all the inspiration i need is the promise of a new day, whatever it brings. the actions i take today make tomorrows good fortune and positive change happen. as frustratin as it is when obstacles keep poppin up to block my path, i still get to make progress. i get to move toward success, achievement, and fulfillment, and work through obstacles in spite of them. i get to treat others as a consequence of the depth of my own spirituality because of a reliance on God that enables me to match calamity with serenity i have some emotional stability. 1 day @ a time...