my daily reflections…

as the years have passed i have found it easier to just let shit be. ive learned to let go of shit i aint got any control over. practicin the serenity prayer, in all its simplicity, along with the 3rd and 7th step prayers have provided me with peace of mind i could never find while i was out doin my dirt. into my recovery for years i learned of a 2nd step prayer that helps me today as well. it goes somethin like this, “Heavenly Father, i know in my heart that only you can restore me to sanity. i humbly ask that you remove all twisted thought & addictive behavior from me this day. heal my spirit & restore in me a clear mind.” this little prayer has helped me to strengthen the hope the 12 steps provide me with. i love how this mornins readin uses the word “gradually”, early in my recovery as bad as i wanted to fix everythin i had fucked up so bad, i had to learn patience. what i have today did not come the first day i walked my sad ass into the rooms, it took time. to this point in my life, its taken 5,773 days. ive learned to stop fightin everythin and everybody with the long view of recovery. with this patient, long view, ive learned to have trust in spiritual things, ive learned to have confidence in my HP and in myself, and ive learned to use hope so that i may look forward with desire and reasonable confidence without placin unrealistic expectation. when i make a life habit of schoolin myself in spiritual things, God reveals Himself to me in many ways. i get be on the side of humankind, convinced that my welfare is generated by the peace and stability of the world. it is a love that produces spiritual growth and stems from my relationships in the world. i get to be aware of communicatin clearly, specifically, and directly with others. and when i do, i get to improve the relationships i have with others. hope and faith help me be aware of all my feelins. they help me remember to be aware that sometimes its not the other person thats makin me crazy, its me thats doin it to myself. everythin recovery has taught me about myself brings me hope that i can continue to feel the glorious release of my spiritual malady. as long as i continue to practice each of the prayers i mentioned, i know He will help me make it happen. 1 day @ a time...