Living Clean the Journey Continues Page 19-21

Why We Stay What is it that keeps us in NA after the initial desperation eases? Of course, there's desire to help the newcomer; our Twelfth Step reminds us that this must always come first. But many of us, at some point in our recovery, have felt that perhaps that was all that was left in the rooms for us. Our commitment to help might have kept us coming back, but some of us were left with a nagging feeling that we hesitated to share: "Is this really all there is?" Our answer today is a resounding "NO". In our lives and in the lives of addicts around the world, we can see change- not only from desperate, lonely people we were when we got here. We can see great changes in ourselves and in the way we relate to others from the first time we work the steps compared to our next pass, and our next. Our experience in NA service teaches us to interact with others in environments that are sometimes stressful, and to remain loving and open even as we stand our ground. We learn when it's important to stand for principles, and when it's best to step aside in the name of unity, knowing that a loving God is ultimately in charge. We plan for the future just for today and let go of the outcome, even when we really want it. Living, loving, surviving loss, and celebrating success, we find the tools of recovery that gave us our lives also help to live with grace, integrity, and joy. As we practice principles, our understanding grows and deepens. There is no limit to the process. There are no limits to where our recovery can take us, no limits to how much better can get. We short-circuit our recovery when we keep a reservation in our Second Step by thinking that there are some parts of who we are that cannot be restored. When we accept the possibility that we can get infinitely better- that there is no end to what recovery has to offer- we bein to understand that spirituality is not just a way our. It is a way of life that will continue to bring us new gifts, new possibilities, and new awareness as long as we practice it. If we allow ourselves to be motivated not by fear of the past but hope for the future, we are as excited to move forward when life is good as we are when we are struggling. We have found a way in- to life, to freedom, to passion, to limitless growth. We are no longer trapped in a process driven by our own desperation. Something different happens as we move into recovery motivated by passion, hope, and excitement. We are released into our own lives. We are freed from the feeling that we must constantly be on guard. We are free to discover that capacity of our own hearts: Where we have been closed down, we have the ability to love and care for others more deeply than we had imagined. Yes, we are a vision of hope, as the Basic Text says. This book is about seeing hope as something that always grows, drawing us forward throughout our recovery and throughout our lives. We don't just recover; we thrive. The NA program gives us tools for living. The work is never-ending, and the rewards of living the program ar ongoing as well. We work to improve our circumstances, creating and re-creating a life that matches our vision for ourselves. Often the change we seek is in our ideas and attitudes. We learn to see the world more clearly. We are so grateful for the recovery we cans ee in ourselves and the people around us. Great rewards are always waiting for us, if we are willings to make the effort. Narcotics Anonymous is a bridge to life, and a path we an walk throughout our lives. The gift is freedom. Each level of freedom we experience opens us to greater freedom beyond, just as each level of awareness allows us to recognize how much we do not yet see. Although we may live very differently from one another, we share the same journey. We are so grateful to have found recovery, to be living clean, and to know, wherever we are in our travels- the journey continues.