my daily reflections…

sittin in the rooms i get to hear the stories of many who came in just as i, riddled throughout with selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. at anys first glance, it would seem impossible to have been able to overcome such emotional torment havin tried for so long on their own will power and succumbin to their alcoholism. and yet as i continue to listen to these stories of utter destruction of personal lives, i later get to hear how they surrendered, accepted, and have come to tolerate themselves as human beins. their stories, as they may be like mine, yet not the same, speak of how the personal submission, acknowledgement, and patience they had gave way to a simple reliance upon an HP. bein familiar with the emotions and circumstances others have faced, i, just as they, had to stop doubtin the power of God. their ideas, lifelong personal beliefs, and morals, just as mine, did not work. those that came in before me gave me their experience to learn from. with their encouragement, i was able to see myself in them. if they could do it with a, not so difficult and simple, change in perception, maybe i could too. today, i have made the change from the above self-centered ego problems i once faced. i have turned my life and will over to the care of my HP. as i live and work a program that offers a daily reprieve to me, i get to feel the peace of mind within that was described to me so early in my recovery. i have been shown how to stay off of the merry-go-round of my alcoholism. it is through prayer and meditation to a God of my understandin. as long as i remain humble and follow the simple directions i was offered when i first came into the rooms, i aint gotta ever suffer or flummoxed by the consequences of doin my dirt, livin in my spiritual malady, again. i can be used as an instrument, just as those who listened and shared their stories with me. its my choice to have joy or misery; its my choice to accept humility and follow the direction of my HP. without the surrender, acceptance, and tolerance i have today, i would continue to blame my problems with others on their stubbornness or selfishness, instead of acceptin the responsibility that rightly is mine to own. askin my HP to back me up with an act of faith, i aint gotta continue to abuse myself or others. ive learned that i am constitutionally capable of bein honest with myself so i can be responsible for myself in my own recovery. with practice, i get to listen, and interpret what i hear as the intuitive voice of my HP. 1 day @ a time...