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i love the autonomy of this program of recovery. though the steps and traditions are set in stone, how i choose to live each one is my decision. it has been my experience that as ive worked them from the beginnin, startin with step 1 and endin with tradition 12, i have been able to use the spiritual principle ive learned through the prior step or tradition on the next one. and by the time i was finished i had an undertstandin that though i may have been on a particular step, i had used many of the spiritual principles for any particular phase of my spiritual development. though i needed the structure and guidance of my sponsor, as i worked each step or tradition, i lived it too. my sponsor did have some suggestions for me to follow which werent too difficult and coincided with the programs procedures for changin my lifestyle. crucial to my ability to take in what my sponsor was teachin me, was my ability to stop all the bovarism i had practiced for so long. if i wanted to change from the inside outward, i had to practice the humility that started when i said i was an alcoholic and wanted help. and i didnt know it then but understand today just how i was bein of service to those around me by practicin a willingness to listen attentively and ask questions about their recovery. i also didnt know that i was practicin brotherly love by simply bein an active participant in my own recovery. and i had no clue that perseverance was somethin i was doin as i awoke each day and read my mornin readins. see all these rules werent rules per say, so much as they were suggestions, and they were just somethin i did because i was done doin my dirt. the emotional, psychological, behavioral, and spiritual pain i went through in my early recovery didnt last, as bad as it felt back then, the hope and promise of better days always loomed ahead. still today, when practicin obedience, i find courage enough to live this day and meet the challenges it brings. when i turn my will over for my HPs, ive enabled myself to continue to build a relationship with my HP which will continue to help me solve my personal problems. i reckon if there were a mess of rules today concernin my recovery, i wouldnt be where i am today, happy, joyful, and free with peace of mind. 1 day @ a time...
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